Floaroma Fracas

Floaroma Fracas is the second episode of Pokémon Clueless Edition. It was written by RTA fan ^(t∣b∣c) and first aired in June 2017.

Synopsis

Generic and Satomi arrive in Floaroma Town, only to get caught up in a dispute between the residents of the town and Team Galactic. The two attempt to cool the situation down, but make it worse.

Transcript

Satomi, Generic and Ledio are shown walking down a route, Generic holding a disc.

Satomi: Where'd you get that?

Generic: I don't know, honestly.

Satomi takes the disc as she shades the top half of it, to see "HM06".

Satomi: Holy crap!

Generic: What?

Satomi: It's the HM for Rock Smash! Ledio can learn it.

Ledio: Oh hell no, pardner.

Generic: Pardner? Really? Since when have you been from 1880?

Satomi giggles as Ledio raises his eyebrows.

Generic: I thought we agreed anyway - I'll take care of the rocks.

Satomi: You sure?

Generic: Yeah! I can lift 400lbs, y'know. I'm not weak as all hell.

A Trainer then sporadically charges at them and challenges them to a battle.

Trainer: I'll beat you with this Magikarp!

Generic, Satomi and Ledio look at each other, Generic confused and Satomi and Ledio attempting to keep a straight face. They fail to though, as they start sniggering.

Trainer: What?

Generic: I think they're trying to say, very subtly, that your choice of Pokémon is a pile of shit.

The Trainer looks unhappy as he brings out his Magikarp, which is swiftly brought down by Satomi's Turtwig. The Trainer then walks away.

Satomi: Right. Moving on!

The three start walking again as they reach a cave.

Satomi: Right, Floaroma should be up there.

Satomi points to the area above the entrance. They then enter the cave as Generic throws a rock out of the way.

Ledio: Damn!

They then walk out of the cave.

Generic: Did we really need to walk through that?

Generic looks over the edge to see where they were less than a minute before. Satomi shrugs as they keep walking and come across Floaroma Town.

Generic: Oh, this place looks nice.

The three look around at the quaint town, taking note of the vast amount of flowers as gentle music plays.

Satomi: This is like those fields you see in movies when a romantic couple are running towards each other.

Ledio: Do those fields also have a 50-man brawl going on?

A record scratch sound effect is heard as Generic and Satomi notice a large group of people fighting. The two also notice members of Team Galactic.

Generic and Satomi: Ah, shit!

---

The trio are seen in the Floaroma Pokémon Center, with Satomi playing on a 3DS and Ledio reading a newspaper with the headline "Clouds Blamed For Sunyshore's Eighteenth Blackout In The Past Two Months".

Generic: What kind of headline's that?

Satomi looks up from her 3DS to see the headline and raises her eyebrows.

Ledio: It's not the most ridiculous headline I've ever seen. I think the weirdest one I've seen is "Ian Gordon Nakamura Whines About Lack Of Water, Gives Castelia City A 2.2/10".

Generic: ...What.

Satomi looks puzzled.

Generic: ...Anyway. What the hell's caused everyone to go batshit crazy out there?

Ledio: I don't know. I can't find anything about it out there.

Satomi: The only way we can find out is by checking.

The three then walk out of the Pokémon Center as they try and approach the situation.

Generic: Hey, what the hell's-

A shoe is shown flying in Generic's direction, but he ducks it and it goes through a window.

Generic: Well then. Satomi, you're up.

Satomi then walks over.

Satomi: Look, we just want to know. Why are you fighting?

Satomi gets no reply as everyone is busy fighting. Ledio watches on.

Ledio: Ah, screw this!

Ledio whistles as a swarm of bugs comes down.

Satomi: Ledio, no!

The swarm envelopes the residents and the Galactic members to the point Satomi, Ledio and Generic can't see them anymore.

Ledio: Oh shit, I forgot how many come when I do that.

Generic: Can I see wasps?

Satomi: And bees?

Ledio: I think I see moths too.

The three then look at each other.

Generic: We can either run or have the shit beaten out of us.

Ledio: I think running might be the smarter option.

Satomi: Me too.

Generic: It's settled then.

Generic, Satomi and Ledio then dash off as the swarm continues attacking the people.

---

Satomi, Generic and Ledio are seen just outside Floaroma Town.

Generic: Right, so. We just pissed off an entire town and some bad guys are probably gonna want us dead now. What do we do?

Ledio: I'd say go onward but there's Galactic guys blocking the way.

Satomi: We should probably apologise to them.

Generic: Please, we'll get socked before we can even say "We".

Satomi: Good point, I guess. Hold on.

Satomi then scans the area.

Satomi: There should be some wind turbines around here...

Satomi then spots about five wind turbines.

Satomi: There! The Valley Windworks!

Satomi runs toward the Windworks as Generic and Ledio follow. Once they reach the tall grass outside the Windworks' building, a Pokémon leaps on Generic.

Generic: Agh!

The Pokémon, revealed to be a Buizel, starts licking Generic's face as Satomi notices the Buizel looks different from normal.

Satomi: Oh my god.

Generic: What?

Satomi starts quivering.

Generic: Ledio, what's going on?

Ledio: That Pokémon is what's called a "Shiny" Pokémon.

Generic: And...?

Ledio: Shiny Pokémon are rather-

A shot of the Pokémon world is shown as Satomi screams out of excitement, which startles the Buizel, Generic and Ledio. Satomi then stops after about 30 seconds.

Ledio: ...Rare.

Satomi looks to see a Galactic grunt guarding the main building.

Satomi: Uh oh. Galactic alert.

Generic and Ledio look to see the grunt. The Buizel then runs and fires water at the grunt.

Generic: Oh Jesus, not again.

Satomi covers her eyes as the Buizel attacks. Ledio then decides to step in and stop the Buizel as Generic and Satomi follow.

Grunt: What the hell's with your Pokémon?

Generic: I do not have a clue.

The grunt pants as he then dashes into the building and locks it.

Generic: Fuck!

Satomi: Right. What we need to do now is just go back to Floaroma.

Generic: Ohh, no. Fuck that noise. I ain't gettin' the shit beaten out of me.

Satomi: Come on, you gotta be strong.

Generic sighs.

Generic: Fine. But if we end up in hospital this is your fault.

Satomi rolls her eyes as they walk back to Floaroma Town.

---

Generic and Satomi are shown walking back to Floaroma. Generic shuffles along slowly as Satomi waits at the town gate for him. Generic looks extremely reluctant to go back into the town. Satomi sighs.

Satomi: Ledio!

Ledio flies over and picks Generic up, dropping him at the town gate. Generic has his eyes shut, expecting the worst, but the residents are back to normal.

Satomi: See? There's nothing to-

A resident then notices Generic.

Resident: Hey! It's those idiots who set the bugs on us!

Satomi: (quietly) --worry about.

The residents slowly close in on the trio. Generic finds an opening and runs through it.

Generic: Don't say I didn't tell you so!

Satomi and Ledio slip out and follow Generic, who runs into the nearby forest. They then hide among the trees as they try and catch their breath.

Satomi: (in between breaths) That... was... terrifying!

Generic: I've climbed Mount Everest and even that was less terrifying!

Satomi: Wait, what?

Generic: Nothing.

Ledio looks over to a tree with yellow leaves.

Ledio: Oh hey!

Ledio points to the tree.

Generic: What? What's so special about that tree?

Ledio: You can put some honey on it and a Pokémon'll come and try and lick it off the tree.

Generic: Huh.

The three walk to the tree as a boot hits Generic in the face.

Generic: Agh, what the fuck?!

Satomi notices a Galactic grunt.

Satomi: Oh, no.

Generic and Ledio look to see the grunt.

Generic: Okay. Real question. What the fuck are you guys doing here?

Grunt: We're taking over the universe!

Ledio sighs, implying this has happened before.

Ledio: You idiots really didn't learn last time did you?

Grunt: What do you mean?

Ledio: Your leader trapping himself in the Distortion World? Giratina?

The grunt spaces out for a moment.

Grunt: Oh yeahhhhh.

The grunt is then hit over the back of the head with a pipe and he falls down. A man is then shown to be behind him.

Generic: When the hell did you get here?

Man: I've been here since yesterday. There was a huge brawl going on and it wasn't gonna calm down so I hid out in here.

Generic: They fought through the night? Do people sleep in this world?

Man: To my knowledge... no. And I've been here for the past 11 years of my life.

Generic looks confused as the man puts his hand out.

Man: Lucas Jackson.

He shakes Generic and Satomi's hands as he walks of the forest but stops.

Lucas: Oh yeah.

Lucas throws a card, which Satomi catches.

Lucas: You're gonna need that.

Lucas then walks out as Satomi notices the card is for the Valley Windworks.

Lucas: You know there's an angry mob out here, right?

---

Satomi, Ledio and Generic are seen with Generic sat on a tree stump.

Generic: How the hell are we gonna get past that mob?

Ledio: I have no idea.

Satomi shrugs as Generic looks to see someone in the shadows.

Generic: Maybe they'll know.

Generic points to the person as Satomi and Ledio look to see the person. Generic walks over to them.

Generic: Hey!

The person jumps back startled, as they come out of the shadows as they are shown to be a young woman.

Woman: What the hell do you want?

Generic: Do you know how to calm this mob outside down?

Woman: Probably. You got any Pokémon that can do backflips on a consistent basis?

The trio raise their eyebrows at the woman.

Woman: What? I'm being serious.

Satomi, Ledio and Generic don't seem to believe her. The woman then whistles as an Empoleon appears and flips consistently.

Generic: And people are impressed by that?

Woman: They act like it's Game of Thrones.

Generic: Huh.

Woman: In the past 11 years I've been here that's impressed people about 300 times.

Satomi steps forward.

Satomi: Who are you, anyway?

Woman: Dawn Ó Muircheartach.

Dawn takes a closer look at Generic and Satomi and notices they don't look like most other people in the Pokémon world.

Dawn: You guys aren't local, are you?

Generic: Not even fucking close to it. We're from Earth.

Dawn: Oh cool, so am I!

Generic: Wait, what.

Dawn: I'm from Galway.

Satomi and Generic look at each other, confused.

Dawn: Ireland.

Generic and Satomi: Ohhhh.

There is a beat.

Generic: So, can you do that trick thing?

Dawn: Sure. By the way, have you guys seen a guy called Lucas? British guy, hella patchy facial hair, wears a flat cap 'cause he thinks they're still in fashion...

Satomi: He went out of here about 10 minutes ago. Why?

Dawn: We're sort of... gettin' it on.

Satomi raises her eyebrows.

Satomi: Aren't you a bit young for that?

Dawn: Hell no! We're both 21!

Satomi: Combined?

Dawn frowns.

Dawn: What 10-year-old would have facial hair?

Generic: Don't piss her off or we're going to end up in hospital.

Satomi: Right. Sorry, Ms. Ó Muircheartach.

Dawn nods as she and her Empoleon go out of the forest. Generic and Satomi then look to see all the residents crowded around Dawn and her Empoleon. She gives them the thumbs up as they run out of Floaroma Town and towards the Valley Windworks. Ledio then follows.

---

Satomi is shown back at the Valley Windworks with the card Lucas gave her and Generic and Ledio behind her.

Satomi: Here goes nothing...

Satomi slots the card into the door as it unlocks.

Generic: These people really have no sense of security do they?

Ledio: They're selectively secure. Most people just let you enter their house in this world.

Generic: ...That's dumb.

Ledio: Yeah. A couple of years ago there was a reported burglary for every day of the year.

Generic: Jesus. And they still don't care?

Ledio points to the Windworks building.

Ledio: What do you think?

Generic shakes his head as the two follow Satomi into the building and spot the grunt that locked it almost instantly.

Grunt: Oh no! You found your way in!

The grunt panics as he runs off.

Generic: Hey!

Generic runs after the grunt and tackles them into a wall, knocking them out.

Satomi: Don't you think that was a bit over the top?

Generic: If I went over the top, you'd know it.

Satomi and Ledio look at him, confused.

Ledio: You haven't already?

Generic: Oh, fuck you.

Satomi smirks.

Satomi: Let's just get these guys cleared out before we end up falling apart.

Ledio: Good idea.

The three then go off and a montage is shown, with Satomi beating multiple grunts in Pokémon battles while Generic throws a few grunts out of windows. The three are then shown with a Team Galactic Commander.

Generic: Do we have to do this?

Satomi: Yeah.

Commander: If I win, you go. If you win, I-

Generic: Oh, fuck this. Ledio, do your thing!

Ledio whistles as a swarm of bugs comes in and attacks the Commander.

Satomi: ...Or we could just do that.

The three then walk out as the Commander raises an arm to try and get out of the swarm, but fails and is dragged back in.

Generic: Why can't we do that every time someone challenges us?

Ledio: Because everyone will be pissed off with us.

Generic shrugs as they leave the building, only to be stopped by Looker.

Generic: Oh, not this guy.

Looker: I've heard Team Galactic are here.

Generic: They were. We just kicked their asses.

Looker: Oh.

Looker walks into the building to check.

Satomi: Oh boy.

Satomi, Generic and Ledio then hear Looker screaming as they run off.

---

Generic, Satomi and Ledio are seen walking down another route, with Generic writing something. The camera shows it's a list entitled "People We've Pissed Off (Probably)" as he writes down "Looker".

Ledio: Do you really have to make that list?

Generic: I made one when I lived in New Jersey, so why not?

Generic flips the page to show a lengthy list of names and a notice saying "P.T.O." on the bottom right hand of the page.

Satomi: If insults were an Olympic sport, you'd probably take the gold medal.

Generic: I know.

Generic flips through about 5 pages.

Generic: So, where to now?

Satomi: Eterna City. It's northeast of here. The second Gym's there. Gotta get through a forest first though.

Generic shudders.

Ledio: What? You scared of forests?

Generic: No! It's just I got lost in a forest as a kid and I saw a ghost.

Ledio: Oh. Well trust me, there's no ghost in here. Unless you count that one that haunts a TV in the haunted mansion in the forest. And the possible Ghost-type Pokémon.

Generic gives Ledio a glance that shows he's annoyed. Ledio grins.

Satomi: ...Anyway, it shouldn't take too long to get through and we'll be out within probably 10 minutes.

Generic: Good.

The three continue to walk as Ledio slows down a bit and creeps up behind Generic, putting his hands on Generic's shoulders.

Ledio: Boo!

Generic: Sweet Mama Jessica's baked potato casserole!

Satomi bursts into a fit of laughter as Generic then chases Ledio around.

Generic: Tell me one of your fears, I'm gonna scare the shit out of you!

Ledio runs circles around Generic until Generic ultimately gives up trying to catch Ledio. Satomi wipes tears from her eyes, still sniggering, as the three continue on to the forest.

---

Satomi is seen lying back, looking at the stars in the sky as she looks to see Generic and Ledio, flat out and on top of each other.

Satomi: I don't know why I've not grasped why I'm not in this world yet.

Satomi stands up.

Satomi: It's always been my dream to be here. I'm here right now. I've not got anyone to hold me back. No "Satomi, this will disgrace the family". No "This is too expensive". No "No"s. I'm free to do whatever.

Satomi looks back at Generic and Ledio.

Satomi: And if I want to help those guys... Then I'll help those guys.

Satomi sighs as she sits down and goes back to looking at the stars.

Reception

TBA

Trivia

TBA